Remember when Silicon Valley hacked the cold-press juice market? In 2013, Doug Evans—a self-proclaimed Steve Jobs-like savant—laid plans to bring his $700, Wi-Fi-enabled, fruit and vegetable squeezer, Juicero Press, to market. Backed by $120 million in venture capital, the Wi-Fi-driven device strangled the contents of proprietary pre-blended fruit and vegetable packets sold exclusively by the San Francisco-based company with four tons of pressure on your kitchen countertop. Months after Juicero…